Apr. 16th, 2009 | 10:35 pm
I always wonder, how can a guy hold the hands of another girl, shower her with sweet words, presents and a whole load of intimacy, and still tells the ex-girlfriend he can't seem to forget her, making it seem as though his current girlfriend is non-existent? How can there be such despicable cheaters lurking around in my life, or maybe, what used to be my life.
For the 3 years you were together with me, how could you like her, when you were supposed to be in love with me? Remember I asked you this question - Do you think a guy can like two girls at the same time? You don't even have to tell me your answer, it's right before my very eyes. Have you thought of how she feels, if she knows that the person she is currently in love with doesn't give his whole heart to her? In fact, I pity her.
We have all moved on. The past has only become such a vague memory I only remember bits and pieces of it. What etches deeply in mind were the times we fought, argued, bickered and all the pain and the tears. It was awful. The sweet times were so minimal.
Right now, I don't remember how your hands felt when they held mine. I don't remember how warm your hugs were, or how addictive were your kisses. I only long for his.
It's hard to take a step back, when I've taken so many steps forward.
You know, there was this one time, somewhere in 2006, when we haven't met for the longest time. It was one of the rare days that you walked me home at night, to my gate. Do you remember that I cried, and told you I missed you, and all you did was to give me a quick hug, and told me that it was late and you needed to get home? Did you ever know how I felt when you just walked away, without even any form of consolation? It was the first, and also the last time I told myself that I'll bother to even miss you this much.
I did so much for you, when all I got in return was an asshole as a boyfriend. How can I not forget? It didn't have to take half as what I did to you for him, and I know he appreciates me much more than you did. Having known you has made me realise how much I appreciate my boyfriend, and how much I will continue treasuring him in the future.
I'll never forget how you broke my heart, and you will never forget how I found someone to fix it.
Are you sure you still can't get over me? This girl who has left you buried deep within the recesses of her brain, this girl whose heart yearns for another guy, this girl who treats you as the ex-boyfriend who treated her so badly? This time round, you really have to take some time off to think about it. It's time you flew.
It would all have been easier, if you never told me you still liked me.
I liked it when he let me stay in his arms, brushed my hair and called me silly girl. It made me realise how much I love him, and it also made me want to be with him. It was till forever.
Apr. 10th, 2009 | 10:51 pm
I've been suffering from sudden bloatedness lately. My tummy starts to pain repeatedly at late afternoon and by night time, it's usually churning. It has happened for 3 days already and I'm quite sick and tired of trying to nurse a really uncomfortable tummy.
Yesterday night I got quite pissed for not being able to have good night sleeps, I went to eat 4 tablets of Bismac, that's supposed to help in indgestion and gastric. To my utmost horror, I woke up a gazillion times in the middle of the night to the sudden outbursts of pain. So much for a good night sleep.
What's happening to me? I wish I can just stop feeling so bloated :( ARGH!
It's Good Friday today and whilst everyone is shopping at the new malls at Tampines One & Illuma, I'm stuck at home waiting for my MSM lecture to begin at 3.30pm. How emo is this. I'm going to spend my public holiday doing something really productive like vacumming and washing my baby. She's in a filthy state now, and she'll be sparkling clean real soon. I simply can't wait.
It's less than a month away to my first paper, and I haven't understood what my POA and MACRO London lecturer has been droning on for the past week. Good game. I hope tomorrow will be a better day.
Something that I'm in need of right now? SHOPPING SHOPPING SHOPPING SHOPPING SHOPPING. I don't care! I'm going to find a weekday amidst my busy schedule, cordon off that special day and drag my girls out to Tampines One. I really need to get to UNI QLO ASAP and after that I'll head off to the boyfriend's house to boast about my latest buys :) AHHHH, I CAN'T WAIT.
It's been an awfully tiring week with 10am-5pm lectures 6 times in 9 days. To think I'm going to spend the coming weekend the same way too. MSM lecture takes up my whole day from 10am-5pm on a BRIGHT Saturday and Sunday. I hope it rains, it makes me feel happier. Did I ever mention that I love the rain? I love the smell of the rain, it lifts my spirits up. And no, I'm not a sadist, the rain just makes me extremely happy.
This post was supposed to be only about my churning tummy, I wonder how I managed to crap out so many paragraphs. My friends should blog more often, then I would have new blog posts to read! It somehow seems that I'm the only one who blogs on a regular basis, so emo lah.
Ok so I really should stop and head off to wash my baby before I start on some endless story about how I am deprived of life. I don't even have time to go pak tor with the boyfriend lah! It's either we spend our days mugging our asses off, or sometimes when we get too tired of books, we just head off to his house, or my house to slack for a while before our parents shove us out for some sinful dinner. I can't remember when was the last time we were both alone, zipping around Singapore in the night like we used to, or window shopping at some mall while he restrains me on spending money on unnecessary accessories. I know I really shouldn't fantasize about having some romantic time together, but you know when life gets a little too boring with POA, MACRO, MSM & MARKETING, you can't help but wish for a little something more.
See! Here I am going on and on again. OK END OF STORY.
Time to get ready to clean my baby and make her as beautiful as me :) Till then!
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